So it's a matter of weeks now until my big day! 12 weeks in fact and my twenties will be over!
Until a few months ago, turning 30 didn't phase me at all. I didn't want to give into the cliché that is panic and worry... regret of the things done or not done (I wrote a list of things I wanted to achieve before I turned 30 and I only got a small fraction of those ticked off)! But something changed recently and turning 30 has me worrying just slightly. I can't say exactly what I am worried about... maybe 'unnerving' is a better word to use.
Last week I sat and stared in the mirror for ten minutes, wondering how I could stop time betraying my body. I've a few wrinkles around my eyes, I've 3 grey hairs and I have a baby belly that although small, just won't budge. It was then that I was interrupted by one of my two amazing little dudes bursting into my room. In the middle of my pity party. He was running around with nothing on but a t-shirt and a spiderman mask and the giggles from the both of us made me forget my moment of woe.
My little dudes remind me of all that my twenties were. My twenties were AWESOME! I accomplished A LOT, a huge amount in fact. I moved to Dublin to be with James and got an amazing job that paid a lot. We holidayed in India, James proposed to me in London at a music festival, we got married, honeymooned in Cuba and I fell pregnant with Ollie. We bought our first home, holidayed in Scotland and London and gave Ollie his little brother, Nate. The last decade needs celebrated and I need to be excited for the next ten years! We are done having babies... our family is already complete so the next ten years are ours to work with in any way we please. I'm more confident, educated and wiser. I've had experience at life!
I have come to realise that in fact, I don't need to act 30. I feel 21 a lot of the time and maybe it is ok for me to keep feeling that way. If it weren't for my 30 year old body, I could pass for someone who just hit the 20 mark. I think that people in their twenties have a mindset where they are striving to be better, to learn, to progress and at almost 30, it feels like I should have it all figured our already... but I don't... so I'm going to continue with my 20 year old mind set... to learn and progress and keep trying to be better. I think that's a good mindset to have. I know who I am now and I know what I want from life and to put both of those things to use while trying to keep learning and moving forward... that can only go well right?
So bring it on. I'm excited to see what happens in the next ten years... I'm excited to see my boys grow and see what lies in store for me and for us as a family.